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A simple question, but it packs a lot of possibilities. Where are you?
Are you just beginning the journey of Starting Over Single? Or have you been on this path for a while and you’re starting to feel more comfortable in this season?
Maybe you’re somewhere in the middle – still struggling with some of the pieces of the SOS life – but you’re sleeping better, eating well and taking care of yourself.
You’re learning how to not only cope but you’re also beginning to feel the freedom of finding your true self again.
In Genesis 3:8, the question surfaces as God is looking for Adam and Eve after they ignored him and ate the forbidden fruit.
God, of course, knew where they were all the time, but he asks the question, “Where are you?” God went looking for Adam and Eve, because in spite of what they did, he loved them.
Wherever you are today, God loves you, too. You’re not completely lost and you’re not in trouble with God just because you’re divorced.
He always goes looking for those he loves. Whether it’s Adam and Eve, the little lost lamb Jesus referred to in the New Testament or every woman who has been betrayed and left behind – God is loving us and searching for us.
Sometimes in the SOS journey, we may want to isolate ourselves and just ignore everyone else. It’s like the animal who crawls off to nurse a wound.
We’ve been deeply hurt and we don’t feel as if anyone understands. So we would rather be by ourselves, eat a quart of Rocky Road ice cream and watch a sad movie on Netflix.
Sometimes we DO need time alone – to meditate, to journal, to think about our goals.
But we also need people around us and we need God beside us. We need the warmth and caring of other human beings and the supernatural power of God.
Sometimes we need to tell people where we are – what we’re going through. We need to be brave enough to say, “Hey! I’m here and I feel invisible. Can you help me?”
We need to be strong enough to say, “Can you go pick me up a hamburger somewhere and then just sit with me while I eat?”
Or on Sundays – when everyone else is sitting with their traditional families – we can search for another single woman and ask, “Anyone with you today? May I join you?”
This isn’t easy, but bravery can jumpstart a new relationship, help us over an obstacle and remind us we don’t have to be alone in every situation.
So here’s an idea:
Journal through the question, “Where am I today?”
- Do I like the place I’m in right now?
- Do I like WHO I am in this current place?
- Do I want to move another step forward on this journey or do I need to sit here and heal for a while?
- What can I do to move forward?
- Is there someone I can call or email who might help me?
Depending on your answers, you can either wait a while, take care of yourself, heal and be still – or you can find someone who will help you move forward.
As a life coach with a specialty for women who are Starting Over Single, I would love to help you talk through this question. Call me at 913.393.GATE (4283) or email email@example.com.
Where are you today? Let’s figure this out together.
©2016 Starting Over Single