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heart-with-handsAnother one of those special holidays that doesn’t feel so good anymore. Valentine’s Day – with its pink and red everywhere, the heart-shaped boxes of chocolates, the roses on sale at the grocery store – all a reminder of what we once had but now is gone.

However, take heart! This is not a day to groan or curl up in a fetal position and wish your life could be different.

You can make today better and actually find joy in the day.

First: look for the good in today. Maybe you keep a gratitude journal. What are you grateful for today? A roof over your head, hot water in the shower, food in the fridge, bills that are paid, children who love you, a support group of good friends.

As we state our gratitudes, they cancel out the grumpies.

Second: look for God in today. One of my clients has a “thing” about cardinals. With their bright red plumage and their sweet chirp, they remind her that God creates what is beautiful and he is still working good things for her life. This morning, she saw a cardinal. It was God’s valentine to her.

Where can you find God in today? Maybe in the smoochy peanut butter kisses of your toddler or the smile of a co-worker. Maybe a special sunrise or perhaps you have a “thing” for cardinals, too. Maybe just in the knowing that God loves you and will never betray your love for him.

Whisper a thank you to God for being with you, especially today.

Third: look for ways to bless yourself. Even if no one brings you chocolates or flowers, you can do that for yourself. Go see a fun chick movie with a friend or have a group of SOS women over for a pot-luck and serve only red or pink dishes. Take a long, luxurious bubble bath with lavender, chamomile and rose petals. Buy yourself something bright red – maybe even a lacy nightie.

You are still beautiful inside and out, so celebrate yourself.

If you still feel discouraged about V Day – call someone and vent. Maybe a pastor or a trusted counselor / coach. Maybe a friend or a family member. They can’t help you if they don’t know the problem.

Look in the mirror and remind yourself how wonderful you are. You are deeply loved. This day is just another reminder that you are Starting Over Single and you are moving toward a better life.

©2017 Starting Over Single